Seems Like Nature Programs Them to Fend for Themselves From Birth

“Bahut Mar Khayega,” the girl retorted as she continued to run ahead of his rickshaw. She must have been barely 5 to 6 years old or lesser. Her answer was spontaneous as the rickshaw driver barked at her for almost coming in front of his speeding rickshaw. She and her friends or maybe siblings dashed into the road suddenly emerging out of the compound that the railways used for storing their materials. The girl could have come under the rickshaw if she had wandered a foot ahead than she did. The moment I saw her dash out of the compound and rickshaw speeding, I almost skipped a heartbeat. However, she was oblivious to the danger that was just averted. She continued to run and her sibling or friends chased her oblivious to what could have just happened.

I could not help but think about her reaction. She was a frail young girl barely two and a half feet. The rickshaw driver was hefty having a pongee and overweight. Had he decided to manhandle her, she did not stand a chance.

This is the biggest difference among the children growing under the shadows of their parents. We infuse so much fear in them about everything that our children immediately curl back into a shell when faced with such situations. They are so dependent that they grow panicky. They seldom find the spontaneity to fend for themselves.

On the other hand, these children playing on the streets have very little scope to fall back on their parents that they grow conditioned to fight their own fight. They have no one but themselves to fend for themselves. They are ready to face the consequences of their decisions and never hesitate to make one, unlike our children who tend to waste a lot of time thinking and fearing the consequences.

Madhav Rao Peshwa was just sixteen when he was made the next Peshwa of the Maratha empire. Alexander was just 16 years when he inherited the throne. There are innumerable people in history who achieved extraordinary feats at a young age. However, some parents still accompany their kids to the SSC and HSC examination halls.

Protecting our children are good, but protecting them to the level that they become dependent on you for every small thing is bad. Don’t think so much on their behalf that you make them incapable of making a decision and facing its consequences. We must give our children room to discover their independent strengths. Sometimes, we must detach ourselves from their problems and let them fight their own fights. Only then will they bloom to become independent individuals who are capable of making their own decisions and will be able to confidently challenge the challenges with the words, “Bahut mar khayega.”

Aren’t we all behaving like this in your relationships?

 

 “I wash my feet every time I step out,” my mother shouted as she rubbed her feet against the bathroom flooring. She had just stepped out to keep our dustbin outside the house for the sweeper to pick up the garbage. The alley leading to the staircase had a lot of dust settled on it. Our sweeper only visits once in two days to collect the garbage and sweep the staircase and alley. It was more than three days since he had come as he had caught the weather.

 My mother could have swept the floor or mopped it. I also happen to step out while I perform the pooja in the morning. I light an incense stick on the beam adjacent to the threshold.

 As I heard her words, a thought crossed my mind, “Aren’t we all behaving like my mom did in our relationships as well. We keep complaining that the other person is not behaving right, but we never take the effort to clean the discord. We just try to present ourselves as righteous rather than trying to clean the floor.